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Sunday, 25 January 2015

Why am I so impatient?




I am at a bit of a cross roads at my life at the moment. Unfortunately, I can't go into detail due to the transparency of a blog, I have to keep a few things to myself even though I am dying to divulge! Anyway, I am waiting on something at the moment and it made me realise how totally and utterly impatient I am. I want to rush into decisions even though I know they're not necessarily right and it really made me sit down and think

WHY AM I SO IMPATIENT???

Is it just me? Or does anyone else have the patience of a small child? If I see something that I like, I want it there and then. I will think about it constantly, how this particular purchase will change my life if I don't buy it. If  am waiting for an answer I will not be able to think about anything else until I get that answer. I don't know what it is, but my mind seems to get totally consumed by whatever it is at the time. I actually think my three year old daughter has more patience than me. I had never really thought about it before, I considered myself to be quite a level headed person (hmm did I?) But actually I am an impatient, giddy, child. This has really made me sit back and think. Why am I like this? (sitting on the couch now, thinking about my childhood...) Am I just a spoilt little girl that hasn't grown up (possibly), or is it down to my personality, slightly anxious, un-able to sit down and constantly multi-tasking...hmmm...maybe I've hit on something.Is impatience just another trait of a busy, stressed, multi-tasker? I guess that makes sense. 

Wasting time kills me


I get nervous and actually feel guilty when I'm doing nothing.By doing nothing, I mean, watching TV, playing a game, reading a book (unless it's for educational purposes). How sad is that? I actually have an inability to relax. Without laying on the couch again, I think think alot of this does come from my dad who has some kind of attention disorder that he's never grown out of and has crazy amount of energy which means he is un-able to stop, ever, much to the disdain of my mother. More over, I think this restlessness just comes from being a busy working mum.The constant pressure of combining being a mother, a wife, a full time job and still finding time to be the person that you were pre this. There is no doubt that it makes you impatient and anxious. There are so few hours in the day we can't waste them! This is not  healthy trait, clearly.


Understand why are you are so impatient

I guess it's like anything, if you understand the root of the problem, it's easier to solve. I understand why I'm like this. I m permanently on edge, but I have a million and one things to do. It makes me a little OCD about organisation. The irony is I am so dis-organised it's un-true, I guess that's why I feel I have to try and be super organised. Does that make any sense? If I have my Asda shop booked, posts scheduled and meals in the freezer I can free slightly less anxious. 


How can I come more tolerant? 


Understand what sparks it
If you understand the things that trigger your impatience, you are one step closer to solving it. An obvious point, but try and avoid these situations. If you know something is going to make you blow your top, step away from the situation

Exercise
For me this is absolutely imperative in avoiding stressful situations. It releases endorphins. The same you get after your have sex. Do you feel anxious post coital? Nope? You get the same high post exercise.


Fill your time with things that you enjoy
I'm not going to say; read a book, take a long bath or listen to music. They may be relaxing to some, but not necessarily you. Personally if I am feeling impatient or on edge reading a book or taking a bath drives me crazy! It has the opposite effect, because my mind is free to wander and over analysis everything. I need to keep busy. You may laugh, but cleaning actually chills me out. I feel like I am doing something productive and keeps me occupied. Everyone is different, often a chat with your BFF is key to keeping calm. If you enjoy it, do it!

Keep everything in perspective
It is easy to build a situation up in your mind. Take a step back and take a reality check. Think what is the worst that can happen? It's not that bad is it? Take a look at some real problems which humble your situation.

Have a rant
Take a load off and whinge and whine to someone you know will just listen. Every body feels better when they share their frustrations.

Most importantly...UNDERSTAND WHY YOU ARE IMPATIENT
You're not born impatient, it is something that you develop. It could be down to a million reason. I often find impatient people are generally people who set themselves un-realistic goals in life. They constantly strive to improve and be the best. I guess I am talking alot about myself when I say this. I know that I surround myself with people who are the same. Never able to sit and relax, constantly having to improve and most importantly improve themselves. Everyone has their own reasons. For me, it was a workaholic father who made relaxation a thing to be ashamed of. Relaxation was another word for laziness and there was no place for that in our house.

I guess we all need to take a step back, do what makes us happy. At the end of the day we are just little ants on a big planet and more often than not, we cannot change our annoyances. 

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